My Bariatric Surgery Adventure

It has been some time since my last post.  To bring you up to date I have now lost a total of 63lbs of which I have lost 40 lbs since surgury on November 12.  I struggled through some really bad bouts with head hunger(craving things that I would never had been able to digest).

I continue to decrease my insulin use.  I can attest that gastric by pass surgery is a great way of dealing with diabetes.  I can also attest to the fact that weight loss is still a long and hard struggle for me.

I am tired of taking very small bites and chewing until all of the flavor in any food is drained.  I can only eat small portions of any one food at a time.  A couple ounces of turkey and I am done.  Drinking water is a long process.  I have been better able to swallow my medications but it is still one pill at a time.

I will be starting support session once a month at my program in January and I can hardly wait.  I feel it is important to learn from others who have had the surgery.  I am on some of the list serves for weight loss surgery and some of the issues I can relate to but many I cannot.

I think writing this blog is a great release, but I have been suffering not so much from writers block as feeling inadequate to the task.  Most of what is going on in my life is pretty mundane and I have been reluctant to put it in the blog.

But this is my journey and I should be recording it even if only a couple of people are following my thoughts.

Right now I am having no regrets about the surgery, but I am sure when I hit a plateau I will.  It is part of this long and difficult journey.  Right now I am struggling with a loss of identity as a fat man.  This has been my identity most of my life with a couple of side trips into dieting.  Most people only know me as a fat man.  At my current weight I still am a fat man and mentally I probably always will be one even if I lose the additional 80 lbs I would like to lose.

With all of its downside and the scorn you get for being a fat man. you also have a distinction from the rest of the world.  You certainly don’t look like the standard issue person.  You create an indentity that people remember.  While not always flattering it puts you apart and sometimes that is not a bad thing.

Please continue reading, because I am still processing all of these changes and will be modifying my thinking as I have more time to contemplate the full impact of what I have done.

I encourage comments and questions and hope to be better about answering.